just not yet

today, mortality patted
one at the back

evading the fates
eight solar cycles
plus moons

autumnal and vernal
hid in frigid mounts
reached sun-drenched lands
touched, finger by
finger

now
grabbed again

by the shoulder

~~~

shake me awake
for I am
now
knocking at my own door


I do not want in yet

I was never really afraid
until now



this at least I deserve.

In the end i would have to say goodbye afterall






















In this proud land we grew up strong
We were wanted all along
I was taught to fight, taught to win
I never thought I could fail

No fight left or so it seems
I am a man whose dreams have all deserted
I've changed my face, I've changed my name
But no one wants you when you lose

Don't give up
'cos you have friends
Don't give up
You're not beaten yet
Don't give up
I know you can make it good

Though I saw it all around
Never thought I could be affected
Thought that we'd be the last to go
It is so strange the way things turn

Drove the night toward my home
The place that I was born, on the lakeside
As daylight broke, I saw the earth
The trees had burned down to the ground

Don't give up
You still have us
Don't give up
We don't need much of anything
Don't give up
'cause somewhere there's a place
Where we belong

Rest your head
You worry too much
It's going to be alright
When times get rough
You can fall back on us
Don't give up
Please don't give up

'got to walk out of here
I can't take anymore
Going to stand on that bridge
Keep my eyes down below
Whatever may come
And whatever may go
That river's flowing
That river's flowing

Moved on to another town
Tried hard to settle down
For every job, so many men
So many men no-one needs

Don't give up
'cause you have friends
Don't give up
You're not the only one
Don't give up
No reason to be ashamed
Don't give up
You still have us
Don't give up now
We're proud of who you are
Don't give up
You know it's never been easy
Don't give up
'cause I believe there's the a place
There's a place where we belong




not now
not yet

please




azrael

is there really a right kind of monster?

in the midst of the hype about New Moon's movie installment I came across some mixed up audio-visuals. searching and scanning through video posts for some favorite artists' and songs' music vids and then hopping along friends' wall images in facebook I stumbled upon these volpes /vamp confu-blends:



well, I'm sorry I can't be the right kind of monster for you..., he said. the song should force louis, armand and the rest to turn to lobos. It MUST.


7>7> 6>6> 5>5> ... 3,2,1...

compatibility at 98.09 % at the next moon-pleiades -orion-junction.

full morphing to occur at stage V of Uranus' conjugation with Alpha Centauri


the song is about the colavolpes' sole heir for his sired vulpine siren. now, due to this, the composer has gone berserker. He is also diagnosed to be afflicted with lupus. How this stings him!


is this a trance-formative thing?

tomorrow

forever is a day
today is non-existent



now
later-nity
everafterall



death comes from within
life is betrothed to pain
hope-folly

escapist's dream
a blind man's vision
mirroring sea

killer mountain
elevated sighs













"Perfect Symmetry"

I shake through the wreckage for signs of life
Scrolling through the paragraphs
Clicking through the photographs

I wish I could make sense of what we do
Burning down the capitols
Wisest of the animals

Who are you, what are you living for
Tooth for tooth, maybe we'll go one more

This life, is lived in perfect symmetry
What I do, that will be done to me

Write page after page of analysis
Looking for the final score
We're no closer than we were before

Who are you, what are you fighting for
Holy truth, brother I chose this mortal life
lived in perfect symmetry

What I do, that will be done to me
As the needle, slips into the run out groove
Love, maybe you feel it too

And maybe you find, life is unkind
and over so soon
There is no golden gate
There's no heaven waiting for you

Oh boy you otta leave this town
get out while you can
the needle's running out
The voices in the streets you love
everything is better when you hear that shout
woooaohhh
woooaohhh
woooaohhh

spineless dreamers, hide in churches
pieces of pieces of rush hour buses
I dream in emails, worn out phrases
mile after mile of just empty pages

wrap yourself around me
wrap yourself around me

as the needle, slips into the run out groove
maybe i'll feel it too
maybe you'll feel it too
maybe you'll feel it too
maybe you'll feel it too

I dream in emails, worn out phrases
mile after mile of just empty pages

The man in 119 takes his tea all alone. Mornings, we all rise to wireless Verdi cries. I'm hearing opera through the door. The souls of men and women, impassioned all. Their voices climb and fall; battle trumpets call. I fill the bath and climb inside, singing.

He will not touch their pastry but every day they bring him more. Gold from the breakfast tray, I steal them all away and then go eat them on the shore.

I draw a jackal-headed woman in the sand, sing of a lover's fate sealed by jealous hate and wash my hand in the sea. With just three days more I'd have just about learned the entire score to Aida.
All holidays must end as you know. All is memory taken home with me: the opera, the stolen tea, the sand drawing, the verging sea, all years ago.

I Will Follow You Into The Dark

Love of mine some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark

No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark
If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me
"Son fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
'cause we'll hold each other soon
In the blackest of rooms

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the No's on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark

death cab for cutie

a
b
c

Oh Sinnerman, where you gonna run to?
Sinnerman, where you gonna run to?
Where you gonna run to?
All on that day
Well I run to the rock, please hide me
I run to the rock,please hide me
I run to the rock, please hide me, Lord
All on that day
But the rock cried out, I can't hide you
The rock cried out, I can't hide you
The rock cried out, I ain't gonna hide you guy
All on that day
I said, Rock, what's a matter with you rock?
Don't you see I need you, rock?
Lord, Lord, Lord
All on that day
So I run to the river, it was bleedin'
I run to the sea, it was bleedin'
I run to the sea, it was bleedin'
All on that day
So I run to the river, it was boilin'
I run to the sea, it was boilin'
I run to the sea, it was boilin'
All on that day
So I run to the Lord, please hide me Lord
Don't you see me prayin'?
Don't you see me down here prayin'?
But the Lord said, go to the devil
The Lord said, go to the devil
He said, go to the devil
All on that day
So I ran to the devil, he was waitin'
I ran to the devil, he was waitin'
Ran to the devil, he was waitin'
All on that day
I cried -
POWER!!!!!!!
(Power to da Lord)
[8x]
Bring down,
(Power to da lord),
[4x]
POWER!!!
(power to da lord)
[12x]

(Instrumental)

Oh yeah, Woh yeah, Woh yeah
Well I run to the river, it was boilin'
I run to the sea, it was boilin'
I run to the sea, it was boilin'
All on that day
So I ran to the Lord
I said, Lord hide me, please hide me
please help me
All on that day
He said, child, where were you
when you oughta been prayin'?
I said,Lord, Lord, hear me prayin'
Lord, Lord, hear me prayin'
Lord, Lord, hear me prayin'
All on that day
Sinnerman you oughta be prayin'
Oughta be prayin', Sinnerman
Oughta be prayin',
All on that day
I cried -
POWER!!!!!!!
(Power to da Lord)
[12x]
Go down
(Power to da Lord)
[3x]
POWER!!!!!!!
(Power to da Lord)
[3x]
Power, Power, Lord
Don't you know I need you Lord
Don't you know that I need you
Don't you know that I need you
Power, Lord!

...

This is how I understood it:
Sinnerman is trying to hide from himself, he is trying to avoid the truth. But he cannot hide, since the rock won't help him, the river can't help him, the sea cannot help him. Even the Lord tells him to go the devil, who has been waiting all day. The Lord cannot help the sinnerman, unless the sinnerman admits his actions. This is clearly expressed here:

Downtown Train

videos added 7/11/11

Outside another yellow moon
punched a hole in the nighttime, yes
I climb through the window and down the street
shining like a new dime
the downtown trains are full with all those Brooklyn girls
they try so hard to break out of their little worlds

You wave your hand and they scatter like crows
they have nothing that will ever capture your heart
theyr'e just thorns without the rose
be careful of them in the dark
oh if I was the one
you chose to be your only one
oh baby can't you hear me now

...


Will I see you tonight
on a downtown train
every night is just the same
you leave me lonely now

I know your window and I know it's late
I know your stairs and your doorway
I walk down your street and past your gate
I stand by the light at the four way
you watch them as they fall
they all have heart attacks
they stay at the carnival
but they'll never win you back

...

Will I see you tonight on a downtown train
where every night is just the same you leave me lonely
will I see you tonight on a downtown train
all of my dreams just fall like rain
all upon a downtown train

a song haunting me

"Welcome," said the spider,
"Come right in."
"I’m so glad to have you,
I feel mighty thin."

"Rest your weary bones,
put down your pack;
the time has now come
to have a snack!"

~ M Ryan Taylor

i'm not a perfect person. there are many things i wish i didnt do 
but i continue learning. i never meant to do those things to you. 
and so i have to say before i go, that i just want you to know 

i've found a reason for me, to change who i used to be 
a reason to start over new, and the reason is you 

i'm sorry that i hurt, its something i must live with everyday 
and all the pain i put you through, i wish that i could take it all away 
and be the one who catches all your tears, thats why i need you to hear 

i'm not a perfect person, i never meant to do those things to you 
and so i have to say before i go that i just want you to know 

i've found a reason for me, to change who i used to be 
a reason to start over new, and the reason is you 
i've found a reason to show a side of me you didnt know 
a reason for all that i do, and the reason is you 



Video added 7/11/11